Randomness.

So I randomly decided to cut my bangs. I think it looks kinda good. I cut them a little too short but it's okay. It's really a non-event, not worth writing about, but I felt like posting something and it's the only thing I could think of that I'm willing to write about. Oh, and I'm going back to the doctor, hopefully soon. I've already started the process, I just have to wait for an actual appointment at this point. I guess it's a good thing. I'm still really hesitant about taking medication, but apparently I need it more than I realize, according to everyone else. *sigh* I know I need the help, but I still don't have to like it. It's okay though, I guess I'll get used to it eventually. My sister's dog passed away too. I'm trying not to think about it too much. Oh, and I got a bunch of new shirts and some new shoes. It's nice to update my style occasionally. I'm not looking forward to summer though. It's gonna be really hot. Oh well, maybe I'll sweat off a few pounds. I tried that B12 dietary supplement stuff today, it made me kinda tired. It made everyone else hyper. Story of my life I suppose, if it gets everyone else going it won't do crap for me. It's okay though. I'm in an oddly serene mood at the moment. It's kinda nice after all the intense mood swings lately. I know it won't last but at least I know I'm still occasionally capable of calmness. I normally put up a calm front to hide whatever intense mood swings I'm going through, but for once I'm actually somewhat peaceful. It's a really odd sensation. I wonder what kind of medication I'll end up on this time. I think I'm going to get them to re-evaluate me too, I have reason to believe bipolar disorder may not be my sole problem, plus I think they might have me diagnosed as the wrong type of bipolar. Who knows, I try not to self-diagnose. Incidentally, I think my theme song at the moment is "Sleep" by My Chemical Romance. It's a pretty accurate depiction of how I've felt for quite a while now. Speaking of sleep, I hope I can actually sleep decently tonight. It's been at least a week since the last real sleep I've gotten. I've been waking up every hour or so all night from horrible nightmares. Sometimes I'm not even sure if I'm asleep or not. I hate not being able to sleep decently, I start disconnecting from myself. Everything is like snapshots, bits and pieces of perception, interrupted and delayed. Oh well, maybe the doctors will give me something to help that too. *sigh*